My therapist seemed to think I would struggle without seeing her for a month over summer although on reflection, perhaps she was just making sure I would be fine for a month and not like have a break down or something.
For the first two weeks I had nothing to think about. I struggle finding things to talk about. What is relevant? What is on my mind? Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.
Maybe I need to subject myself to more people.
Anyway. After a week away with my parents and sister, I have found many complications in my mind. Most notable that obviously so much of my personality had come from my parents and that had caused misery. Now I have climbed past these issues, seeing them in front of me is an uncomfortable reminder of who I was before and it's pretty horrible to be near it. It's like I hate who I once was, maybe I need more compassion for myself.
Aside from this I am struck with tension and anxiety once more from one of my days off changing at work and suddenly I'm questioning my whole existance which is obviously the most rational thing I can do.
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